Thanksgiving and feeling a bit thankful

Left pics were taken in June. 

Right pics were today. 

Thankful even if I am not healed. 

Pampering.

Right now I am getting my first pedicure in a year and a half. My feet never flared that bad but I have avoided unecessary public outings as much as possible. I hope a manicure can happen soon. 

Last nights sleep was very broken as I had a lot of nerve pain but did not peel too bad today after my shower. Slowly but surely this has to go. 

I survived.

DThis weekend my little family and I took out our new trailer to break her in. I started having a bad flare on Friday night and it is continuing today. Below are the pics of my hands and wrists. I am getting better but I am still in so much pain. 

Recording pain.

The last few days. The weekend. I was in so much pain. Saturday hurt but today was terrible. 

I flared, from painful to semi excruciating about 6 times today. From tired and achy skin to stinging and on edge burning skin. 

I cannot wait for this to be over. 

Thinking.

I often wonder where my life would be if this had never happened. I am in and out of the stages of grief. A balancing act that I often fall flat on my face, that is life right now. Would we have had another baby?  Would I be working?  I cry often hoping and seeking this to end. Soon. Eventually. It must happen.

The last few days have brought on bright red and burning flares. 

The best I have looked in a year.

OMonth 22- while still painful but I can see healing. The photos below I took today. This is best I have looke since this time last year. Please let this continue. 

Rant. Sadness.

I am in 4 private Facebook groups related to Tsw. And to see people healing is uplifting but to have to wake up covered in 'eczema' makes me sad. I really want to be healed. I have hope but at the same time don't know what to do. I am getting better but every night, and sometimes throughout the day, I get bright red only to know I will peel over my entire body again the next morning. Ugh. Sad. The discomfort and pain are indescribable but there is nothing I can do.